w- in 1942, author isaac asimov introduced the three laws of robotics to protect man from their cybernetic creations b- and thank god he didn't include anything against robot-on-robot violence the world would just be, way less fun.
snake from nightmare before christmas, w- mega man, the blue bomber b- and astro boy, the atomic wonder child. he's wiz and i'm boomstick w- and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills
to find out who would win a death battle! w- in the year 200x, a new age of robotics was dawning, heralded by doctor thomas light and his partner, doctor albert wily. together they planned to launch mankind into a new age of prosperity b- so, they made a bunch of robot masters to do things too dangerous for people like cutting down trees, bringing down buildings and... ...being cold. w- however, jealous of doctor light's increasing notoriety- b- and beard growing skills!
damn, look at that thing i'd take a nap in that shit. doctor willy stole all of light's robots and used them to try to take over the world b- all except two; roll, a robo-girl built for housekeeping and sending feminism back to the 60s w- and rock, light's loyal lab assistant and surrogate son. b- wily would regret this mistake about ten times over give or take. w- after watching his human father fall to ruin over wily's betrayal,
rock stepped up to take on the burden of saving the world himself. but first he would have to upgrade into the super fighting robot called... mega man ♫ super-fighting robot! ♫ ♫ mega man ♫ mega man's new body is composed of "ceratanium", an alloy lighter and stronger than titanium. of course. b- think that's cool? well his hand can transform into a long-range cannon called the "mega buster"
a weapon so downright awesome, rock named himself after it. now it may look like it just shoots lemons; but one shot can blow through a wall and if he needs more power mega man can charge it up for a devastating blast. still not enough for you? alright, well he can transform his other hand into a second mega buster, and fire both of them at the same time. suuure, using that much power can overheat and even kill him, but... ehh, what's life without a little risk and double the firepower? w- but mega man's bread and butter is his variable weapons system
w- with it he can wield any weapon he acquires including those taken after defeating rogue robot masters. b- considering he's beaten over a hundred of them... *small chuckle* that's a lot of weaponry. he can fire heat-seeking dive missles, lock on target with magnet missles and even fire a swarm of hornets!?! who in their right mind would make robot hornets?? w- his metal blades are buzzsaw bullets made from ceratanium which can cut through almost anything, the hard knuckle fires a fist that can break down walls
and the mirror buster returns energy projectiles back to sender. b- but when he wants to bust out some real fire-power, he has the crash bomb a timed explosive which sticks to walls and enemies faster than the girl who said she loves you on the first date w- and fully charged, his atomic fire has the potential to reach temperatures hotter than the surface of the sun. b- he can stop time, with the... time... stopper... but can't use other weapons while its active and he can even create black holes w- weeell... sort of a real black hole is fueled by consuming matter and evaporates only after all matter around it has been swallowed up
however the "black holes" that mega man fires with his "black hole bomb" have a definitive life-span, aaand can be sealed in concrete it may not be a legitimate black hole but it does create an extremely powerful and deadly vacuum b- so does roll! he's also got rush, who is like the best dog ever! you never have to feed him, he never shits on your couch and he turns into a sweet-ass set of armor called the "super adapter." w- sure, wearing the super adapter means mega man forfeits all his special weapons, but in exchange he gets a massive boost in physical strength, the ability to fly and he can even fire his fists like rockets.
b- mega man has stopped wily's plans more than twenty times. he's durable enough to survive the vacuum of space, strong enough to hold up a collapsing castle, and dumb enough to jump and shoot like his normal self while on freaking jupiter. w- the gravity of which would have made him weigh well over five tons. b- he's also defeated his alternate future-self. twice!! how does that even make any sense? *impersonating mega man* screw you, future! you can't make me wait for me to get there! w- mega man is like a walking arsenal, and can carry and can carry as many weapons as he likes. however, adding too much to his system seems to also affect his behaviour, making him more violent, ruthless...
so for his own sake, he'll often discard his special weaponry after a mission's completion. b- aww, what a wuss! c'mon, there's nothing wrong with a little bloodlust the real downside is his special weapons have limited ammo. w- even so, mega man is an exceedingly adaptable powerhouse. b- land, air, sea, space, if a crazy german is trying to take over the world, there's only one man to call: the mega man! hey mega man! you're a little low on air! and you're full of sh-*beep* w- in the futuristic year of 2003,
tensions were escalating between mankind and the robots they built to serve under them. but one brilliant robotics engineer was dealing with a far more personal problem. b- like most scientists i know, doctor tenma paid more attention to his work than his family especially his 13 year old son, tobio. well, until little toby decided to take their future car out for a spin aaand... got himself killed. you bettter believe pops started paying attention then. aahhhhhh!!
w- filled with grief and regret, tenma became desperate for a second chance at being a father. b- but instead of doing it the old-fashioned and fun way, he called up all his robotic engineer nerd friends to build him a new son. they did, and they called him... the mighty atom. but us americans were like, "f*ck that! lets name him after the dog from the jetsons and zoooooooom!" ♫ go, go, go astro boooooy ♫ w- astro boy assumed the role of tenma's late son, even attending school and doing chores. things were going... well, until tenma came to the realization
that astro would never would never truly replace tobio. his resentment only grew every time he looked at the young robot's unaging face. b- so he came up with a brilliant plan; he sat down with his son, talked about his issues and worked out all the resentment. *boomstick chuckles* no i'm just kidding, he sold his ass to the circus. *still chuckling* stupid robot, you're property. w- astro spent his time performing, until he was found and adopted by doctor ochanomizu, whose kindness inspired astro to stand up for what's right and defend the world.
b- he is pretty good at it, too. mostly because dad #1 was so scared of losing another son, that he equipped this one with a shit-load of weapons. like a finger laser and transforming arm cannons w- astro boy was built with seven amazing powers: he has jet-powered flight, flashlight eyes, the ability to translate more than 60 languages, instant discernment between good and evil, a hyper intelligent electronic brain, ears 1,000 times more sensitive than a human's- b- and butt guns!!
no, really, he's got *cracking up* two machine guns, poppin' out of his pooper. huh? arrrrgh!! i got machine guns... ...in my butt?!? w- while that may seem... unorthodox, astro boy's rear-end retaliation serves as a handy surprise attack in battle. b- nobody suspects the butt-guns i mean nobody, why would they??? astro also possesses 100,000 horsepower strength,
he can break concrete without even tryin', or tunnel through solid rock with ease. w- but his most fascinating aspect is his skin. derived from an artificially created super-plastic, astro's body is tough enough to survive everything from the depths of the ocean, to a dip in the sun. b- plus, he's a versatile fighter. he's taken on water stealing aliens, dog turned into human robots stealing diamonds from the moon and a robot named satan that shot lasers out of it's *cracking up* nipples... *strained voice* i can't make this up. w- he beat pluto, the most dangerous robot assassin in the world after being upgraded to 1,000,000 horsepower. this gave him the strength to lift a crew ship out of the water and fly through 30ft of solid iron like it was thin air.
b- probably must have seriously cut down on his miles per gallon. speaking of which, how do you refill a robo child- ah! f*ck!! of all the ways, why that?!? wiz, i'm pretty sure we just ended up on a watch list and i need a shower. w- i mean... *stammering* it wouldn't have been my first choice. i chalk it up to doctor tenma's eccentricity? design necessity? b- well, you'd think that being a half-naked flying death child would be pretty great,
*muttering* minus the whole rectal recharge, but astro is hardly invincible. w- tough as his super-plastic skin may be, astro does have an innate fear of being melted by extreme heat and sometimes a strong enough blow can cause his joints to break apart. in addition, astro sometimes over-exerts himself to the point of dangerously draining his power supply. b- if completely depleted he's as good as dead. but hey, sometimes it's worth spending the energy to plow a robo chick so hard, it levels an entire city. w- no matter what the challenge, astro boy will always give it his all. wait, are you sure you're ready for this astro?
i was made ready. alright, the combatants are set. let's end this debate once and for all. b- it's time for a death battle! ko! b- forecast calls for a 90% chance of mega man showers and a 10% chance of sadness. w- while mega man varied arsenal kept astro boy on his toes, that's about the only edge he has. b- yeaaah, astro boy outclassed him everywhere else. w- mega man's greatest display of strength comes from when he held up a 20 storey tower worth 60,000 tonnes,
delaying its collapse just long enough to escape. b- impressive. buuut... not compared to astro boy, who can lift a 100,000 tonne ocean liner with total ease. w- mega man defeated quick man who is faster than lighting, or over 224,000 mph b- that's cute. after patching things up with dear old dad #1, astro boy was so excited that he took a victory lap around the entire planet in 2 seconds, w- clocking in at just under 45,000,000 mph! b- plus, astro survived a bomb capable of stopping a solar flare! heck, he got accidentally blasted by an atomic disintegrator gun and was still completely intact! w- ultimately the difference in power, speed and durability is abundantly clear
and with mega man's limited ammunition reserves, all the blue bomber could do was delay the inevitable. b- mega man just couldn't keep it together. w- the winner is astro boy. b- next time on death battle... my name is oliver queen. after five years in the hell, i returned home with only one goal; save my city. i have become someone else.
i had become... i had become... something i had become... something else... ♫ da-da-dadah, dah dah-dah-dah! ♫ *kick* ooo! aaaaahhhhh!! the green arrow. hey guys, i'm ben, i play wiz i'm chad, i play boomstick. thanks so much for watching mega man vs astro boy it's been one of our most requested fight since we started doing the show.
b- yeah, and huge props to the new animator, aquila, for the awesome fight animation. but for next time... we've got green arrow we've got green arrow versuuuuuu- c- if you wanna find out, just head over to our social med- okay who am i kidding, it's hawkeye. you know it's hawkeye if it wasn't hawkeye that would just be ridiculous, but hey... if... you wanna be cool and just follow the social media anyway that's @screwattack on twitter or /officialsa on facebook, that'd be sweet.
b- ehhhh, that'd be nice, that'd be nice also you can check out the latest death battle episode prior to this one by clicking... *hands off, chad* us. *chad quickly says yep* and also the rest of the death battle playlist we got like, over 50 of these episodes right now. c- we've been doing this for a long time now. b- yeah. c- and if you haven't heard our big news about us partnering with rooster teeth well, you might have some questions and we answer those in a q&a, so just click that video
and we will hopefully answer your questions.
*thumbs up* we'll see you guys next time. thanks again for watching! *chad stop that* wave jostlin'! b- *muttering* chad- jostlin', stop. stop, you're embarrassing yourself. c- you have like arthritis in your shoulder or something.
